Megan O'Neill

Mindset Mentor

blocks

What is blocking you from talking about your success?

beliefs around successI recently attended the Businesswoman of the Year Awards in Ottawa, Ontario and spoke with the President of the Women’s Business Network of Ottawa, Karen Wilson, who helps put together this awards gala every year. We spoke about the accomplishments of the award nominees and winners. She said that every single woman who applied for these business awards had trouble filling out the part about themselves and their business. These women still struggle with their beliefs around success!

This fascinated me because these are the blocks I work with. Here are these successful businesswomen who struggle to talk about themselves—so if you’re just starting out and struggle, know it’s not just you! Even successful, award winning women business owners struggle to talk about themselves and their businesses!

The following day I was speaking with a financial coach who told me about how she struggles with accepting that she is successful. This woman has a degree from an Ivy League school and is very successful, yet she still struggles. Why is this?

Do men struggle with talking about themselves?

I don’t think so. Cultural messages that influence them as well as the beliefs that we develop as we grow up affect how we talk about ourselves. These messages tell us that women should not get too big for their britches; that women shouldn’t be too confident in their successes or they will come across too strong and immodest.

These beliefs are deadly to a woman’s mindset.

Hopefully by talking about this we can bring to light how to change this mindset for women in business and how the beliefs around success many women seem to have.

Do you struggle with talking about how great your product or service is? Have you tried faking it until you make it? Imagine what it would feel like if you just felt successful and were not afraid to talk about that success? Think about women you believe are successful and have a great mindset – think Oprah Winfrey. Think of how confident she has become throughout her career and how fearless she is to talk about herself.

Then do the deeper work. When people are not able to value themselves and their business that usually spills into other personal areas of their life. Perhaps they hesitate to advocate for themselves in their relationships or friendships—or other areas of their lives. These beliefs may start as far back as childhood and only once you start thinking about them and digging deep can you uncover them and then work on changing these beliefs.

If you would like to learn more about how to change your blocking beliefs and work on creating a healthier mindset, join my private Facebook Community or set up a time to chat with me. I look forward to connecting!

How to change old negative beliefs into new healthier beliefs

CHANGING OLD NEGATIVE BELIEFSRecently, Rachel, a member of my closed Facebook Group asked the question, “Once you have identified mindset issues and recognize your beliefs that aren’t serving you, how do you go about changing these beliefs to new, healthier beliefs?”

Beliefs are key to moving to the next level of your business. They are key because they are what create your emotions and actions. For example, if you feel like you are a fraud and have self-doubt then you will procrastinate to take action. You will also shy away from making yourself more visible – inhibiting your business growth.

There are many fantastic people out there with exercises that make you hunker down and focus on your beliefs. These questions make you look at your beliefs and can help you realize what is holding you back.

There are a couple of ways to approach your blocks. Firstly, start to educate yourself on healthier beliefs. What is the counter belief to your negative belief? If you don’t know research until you find one. For example, for negative money beliefs you can look at Suze Orman for more positive, healthier beliefs.

Unfortunately, you can’t always do it this way. Sometimes books, seminars, etc. still don’t help you to switch your beliefs. Regardless of how intelligent you are you may still struggle with switching your negative beliefs. This is because there is parts of you that are deep down that do not want you to change it. These deep down beliefs believe that the way you are operating still works; there is a part of yourself within your subconscious that does not connect you to the present. This part does not match what you know to be true.

A Core Belief Engineering Practitioner, such as myself, works with you one-on-one to help you look at these deep-down subconscious beliefs that were probably formed in your childhood. For example, if as a child you overheard your parents talking about how money doesn’t grow on trees and that they worked hard to get what little money they had, as an adult your mind still runs that belief. Even though your modern, adult mind knows that is not true for you, your subconscious belief is still running and only through specialized work can you get to this subconscious belief and turn it into a positive belief.

To get started with what your blocks are create a journal and talk about your beliefs so you become more conscious and aware. If you feel you need professional assistance, let’s start a conversation.